MS stops people from _____. We exist to make sure _____.
Here, I'll get the ball rolling:
MS stops people from playing in marching bands. We exist to make sure there's something to watch during halftime at high school football games.
MS stops people from joining the army. We exist to make sure every American platoon in Iraq has at least one guy who always has to pee.
MS stops people from attempting 58 of the 64 sexual positions described in the Kama Sutra. We exist to make sure you get a chance at those other 6, including the one known as "the barking rabbit".
Prize? I haven't decided. Rules? I reserve the right to make them up arbitrarily. Go nuts.